December 2011
12 posts
pulled the trigger
…and made an appointment for therapy, today. I was amused by the answering service giving me major attitude for trying to make an appointment while “THEY’RE CLOSED FOR THE HOLIDAYS!” No shit, bitch. I wanted to do it before I forgot, lick me where I pee.
But, do you really think it’s a good idea to fuck with someone making an appointment for therapy? She’s lucky...
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bullets
Do me a favor, if a designer ever asks you what your title is so they can update your business cards, do not be cute and say Captain of Awesome or King of the Underworld. Like I’ve never heard that one before. Besides, we all know I’m Captain of Awesome.
I have a Christmas tree up in my living room, but nothing on it. I’m going to tell people I’m going for the natural...
murder on the horizon
My office is moving this week. The busiest person in the office, my boss, is in charge of it. I’m about ready to tear the flesh off my coworker’s faces if I hear one more whiny complaint about having to pack their own stuff or where they’ll be sitting in the new office. I cant even believe she is still civil to these assholes.
How many offices have you worked where you get to...
truth and nothing but
—You know that thing where the doctor says you are out of the woods and then the other doctor doing the procedure says you’re not out of the woods, yet? Yeah, that. Quit moving my woods! Dammit!
—On a lighter note, I have band-aids on my boob. Because band-aids are hot, right? I’m like a stripper in Indianapolis. Someone better make it rain up in herre. Wait, where are you going?...